December's Lesson

There is nothing, I think, that brings me so much joy as touching something or someone I love! I sit here with my kitty who is old and I know she will not be around forever and so I indulge childishly in this present moment of being with her little 3 pound body of loveliness. It is so important for us to spend time with those we love. That is December's lesson to me. We never know how long we have our how long our loved ones have and thus I believe we must relish each moment. I just heard somewhere recently (and right now I cannot seem to recall just where) that the present is called the present because it is a gift to us. And some other great thinkers have commented on their belief that worrying about the future or replaying negative memories from the past is a useless and unproductive activity... It is true that if you stop thinking too much about negative frivolities and stop feeling sorry for yourself and instead switch your focus to the present moment, you may actually be positively surprised. Because after all... most of those little worries and thoughts do not exist... Or at least they didn't, until you started giving importance and power to them. I think we ought to enjoy the present and focus on it as much as possible. I mean, the present is kind of nice, don't you think? If you really stop thinking about it and go outside and breathe and look out at everything before you. And while every single person on the planet may not be able to sit safely and relish the moment and be with people they love, that is more the reason for you and me to... I lost my aunt this month and I'm losing my cat I've had for nearly 20 years of my life. She is my wingman and most of my hours on this earth have been blessed and made easier/ more pleasant with her walking by my side. To be honest, I think losing my aunt has helped prepare me (if there is such a thing?) for what I'm going through with my cat. Not because one is more important than the other, but because once you lose one person close to you, heartbreak is already sitting within and you know that it's not going to be easy... but I suppose if it's going to happen, it's going to happen and you just have to accept it and take what you can from it. Loss is not an easy thing to go through at all. But if there is one thing positive to take from loss of loved ones, it is that we must live our lives fully and well and really make that effort to be around the people we love who make us happy. "Don't it always seem to go, that you don't know what you've got til it's gone"... Don't let that lyric ring true for you. Okaaaay? ....Peace and holiday joy to all, this beautiful season.

JoAnne Gallagher 1953-2008

In Loving memory, I dedicate this post to you, my beautiful and loving aunt. May you rest in peace and may your spirit soar peacefully. You have taught me how to love and how to live. I aspire to be as dedicated, giving and honest a person as you were to every single person that stepped foot into your life. Here is my promise to dedicate my life to living fully and loving well... doing the things that make me happy and 'getting over' the petty pitfalls of life... and getting back up again when I fall and walking forth with honor and humble pride in knowing that I am walking with integrity... I commit to a life long journey of always striving to be the best that i can be... and I relish in my quest for the union of body, mind and spirit. You have lead by example and I want to follow in your footsteps. I hope that I can touch others as you have and brighten the world with my spirit... as you have. Yesterday, I felt the emptiness of the earth without your footprints on it's sand... an unavoidable hollowness as the reality of your absence finally sunk in... and today I am remembering that some of the most beautiful things in life are the things we cannot see... Like love, I cannot see you but your energy will be forever and ever everywhere around me and this beautiful place we call Earth. You are forever in my heart and you have left some of the most wonderful gifts behind for the rest of us: your children, who are going to take the world by storm and shake it from sphere to sphere with positivity, love and productivy as we move forward into a new age. Here's to you, as you guide us all towards a higher standard for ourselves... set forth by the one and only you. God bless and thank you for all of the magic you have given my soul and my heart. I will always miss you.

Forever and ever with love,
Your Neice

Big Gratitude

I write a tad early because tomorrow I will be spending it with peeps I love and not typing!

I think sometimes we forget about that first Thanksgiving. A lot of people died that winter. And it was the beginning of our steps towards democracy... towards our America as we know it. Now I myself am to blame for this, but we often complain about our leaders and our problems with this country... we declare that we will buy a chateux in France and go be free and read and raise sheep (perhaps that's only my extreme idealistic daydream)... And we forget that in France taxes are indeed higher than they are here. So while we rant about rights and unfair this and how dare that president use the word "folks"-- I mock too, friends-- let's put that aside for today... all I'm asking for is one day... of pure gratitude for what the people who walked before us achieved for this country and let us be so grateful that we can for the most part not be afraid to walk down the street everyday. If you are reading this blog you are so fortunate to have a computer and be able to read this posting that I am writing and to write and publish your own ideas-- for free!-- and not get punished with violence for doing so! So today, you will get many reminders to be grateful for your loved ones... to be grateful that you still have your home after all the crazy fires... and all of that is fantastic! Yes, be grateful for those things too!! But what most people I think may forget, as the holidays round the corner and turkey becomes synonymous with Aunt Bertha's strange green dressing and Uncle Mervin's smelly hugs... what we forget is how amazing this country is to all of us most of the time. When we have a lot of great things it is easy to pick apart the annoying stuff. But seriously, guys. We are so darn lucky we don't even realize it. Google images of a third world country if you need some motivation for gratitude but today I am saying, "thank you, to those who took that first step in crossing the seemingly-infinite waters to get here and thank you pilgrims and indians for choosing to celebrate life and be friends together (at least the ones in Plymouth) and thank you founding fathers... thank all of you who have contributed in letting me be typing with freedom on this keyboard today."

dani's library of literary gems

the foutainhead... the great gatsby... the napping house where everybody's sleeping... the secret history... plato's republic... the elements of style... franny and zooey... think and grow rich... the active side of infinity... the secret... the power of awareness... the yellow wallpaper... heart of darkness... in defense of food... the way of the artist... to kill a mockingbird... a moveable feast... the will to believe... the sovereignty of good and other essays... a walk across america... aristotle's poetics... tender is the night... acrobat of the heart... love in the time of cholera... the alchemist... i capture the castle... siddhartha... demian... and some others i'm forgetting that i will be sure to include at a later date!

cray yoga sex

Here is the link to the video on which I am commenting: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h2lIqjeZqOs

I don't even know why I'm posting this! But I had the urge. I think it's thoroughly fascinating! So, basically this guy talks about the importance of tantra (you know... that ancient art of the bedroom...) And he lists the number one reason for practicing tantra and elongating 'that feeling' as being the conservation of engery. There is an Ayurvedic (Ayurveda is the holistic science literally translated as "knowledge of life" originating in India long long ago) term that describes the essence or energy behind all life. It is called Oja. This yogi says that everyone is born with a set amount of oja, or life sustanance. The theory goes that sexual energy, when used, uses up your oja... and thus, could lead to less life, or early death if not attended to appropriately. In college I took a course in Chinese medicine and ancient Chinese medicine believes in a similar life-energy called jing (not to be confused with chi). It is said that when a man ejaculates he looses jing. Men in China would go on abstinence hibernations during the winter to preserve, maintain and utilize their jing for staying warm in the winter. I also just read in a fabulous Western science book other day that sex and stress are the two largest taxes on the body, with digestion being the third. (So don't eat in bed!) Now, none of these sources or cultures says to avoid it; au contraire... they mention that it is a natural part of life. Perhaps to ignore its existence would be to ignore one's appetite for food. But even though eating is the third most energy consuming process in the body, we can all agree that it is a completely necessary part of life! I'm not saying to go be careless and give away free love... no! Love can be given many different ways, I assure you. But what I am saying is that there is a time and a place for great f-ing sex. And like all things in life, we gotta balance out work and play. I know people in Hollywood who forgo sex when they are writing or creating. So maybe there really is something powerful in holding onto that sexual energy and redirecting it into some other energy, namely creative energy. And maybe there is something to this tantra... after all, if it increases sexual endurance, stamina, sensation AND prevents the release of too much all-too-precious life-giving oja, well then... I'll tantra to that!

The Call of Duty

Have you ever felt in your heart or gut something so true and real that you knew you must attend to it? If that feeling consumes you it is crucial not only to yourself, but to humanity, that you trust it and follow it. Usually such feelings come in the form of a piqued interest. But more often than not, we do not have consuming feelings-- we have subtle hints, a shudder when we're standing alone thinking a seemingly harmless thought when the wind comes and shakes us into a scary moment of the unknown... Sometimes it is an emotional feeling, sometimes an image, sometimes a thought, sometimes a physical wrenching of the stomach or the thing that pumps our blood. And most of the time... we ignore it. That day comes where we are looking at the ocean and we know for a second that we are looking back at ourselves... that our truest nature is fulfilled and present in that moment. But then a cry from the mother, husband, sister, neighbor or buddy comes and it is broken. We go back inside the house or hotel, forgetting that we're here to learn something. And often we choose not to go back to it... because we know that if we go back to it, we are responsible for going back to it again and again until the consumption is not a mere feeling but a union of the mind, body and spirit with it's purpose in the universe. It can be like looking into a black hole.. not sure if you'll surface once you're in.... So what, then, stops us from going there? From seeking the unknown? Why are people in general, so scared to try new things, be it a new sushi roll or a stranger with an extended hand? I don't have these answers, but I know that it is important to ask these questions. If we are not seeking, are we doing anything? Really, when it comes down to it? Isn't all of life kind of about seeking something?... whether it be metaphysical or tangible... I think maybe. So isn't it in you're highest interest-- in our highest interest-- to seek the truest form of the self? Maybe enough people aren't seeking... maybe that is why the world is seemingly chaotic and cruel. Maybe our focus is off... I live in a culture where success is the driving force throughout day to day life. It's not even that success is bad-- in fact it is wonderful, because when one aims to succeed, one is in a constant stage of seeking and contributing to the betterment of mankind (and hopefully the planet too)-- but I think that while trying to succeed, one must also hold the purpose of allowing oneself to get closer and closer to the true, blissful self. Success is great if it brings bliss.. if it fulfills purpose. But if one seeks success without joy or sense of purpose, what is the point? I like money because I think it buys freedom and the ability to go on adventures and grow... but for me, I would not be able to pursue money in a vehicle that does my soul a disservice.... My point becomes that one must adhere to the self, above all else. Be true to yourself and listen to yourself. And even when other's are bombarding you with opinions that are not your own, listen to them... because even if you do not agree or believe in what they are saying, even one word or image of their speech can expand your mind, grow your spirit and bring you closer to the real you. And I think that when people listen to themselves that deep down, intentions are good. A friend once said to me, "I don't change... I think I just become more and more myself." At the time I thought this person was crazy... now I laugh because it is pretty darn true. When your gut is tries to steer you in a new, potentially scary direction (provided it is not endangering), it is your responsibility to follow it. Even if you do not know what you want, little things you want or like start to point you in the right direction. And when you are comfy in one place and your inner self taps you and says, "umm, I think I'd like to go here and try this" I think it might be a good idea to listen. And I'm not talking about drugs. Or crazy things. You know what I'm talking about. It is your call of duty to be true to your self.... It is your call of duty to yourself.

obama-rama fantastico!

If Obama can do it, you can do it! YES, you can! He goes to show us that anything is possible. Follow your dreams!! Or if you don't know what your dreams are, follow your nose-- it will steer you in the right direction until you find what you are looking for. I was listening to a woman on the radio yesterday who was talking about Obama's example of hope. And she's absolutely right. Obama's election stands for many things-- many great things. He is the first black president which is very cool, but his victory extends far beyond breaking barriers of race. It is a step in the right direction in building universal tolerance, which is something very important to me, as I try to demonstrate in my posting entitled "tolerance." And I am extremely happy that he is our elected leader. And judging by the landslide victory, most of my fellow countrymen agree with me. I think that as the age of aquarius dawns on us, we as a nation and as a human race are becoming more aware. We are becoming aware that our actions have consequences and that we are in need of change so that we can move in a more positive direction. Thats why grassroots movements are so hot right now. Grassroots movements are effective because in a time like this, all we have is each other. People. I'm involved with a network marketing company and that's the thing i love most about it-- just getting to talk to people, different people-- and help spread awareness. In the case of my company it's awareness of health, but i'm also referring to an awareness of other people, in general. The universe is not centered around you. Though I do believe we all contribute to creating it-- that in essence, you do create or manifest as you go. And that you are ridiculously important. But it is so crucial to acknowledge the presence of other people in this universe too.... to know that one's consequences effect the entire world. Like when you put your finger to water and touch it... the water ripples out. The wealthy democrats of hollywood knew that voting for Obama would mean higher taxes for them, and therefore less money in their pockets. But they did it anyway. Because they knew that if they followed their hearts, voted for a more noble, more people-based cause and voted for higher ideals, that the money would come back to them in some other way, some day. That's how the universe works! The mayan calendar ends in 2012. I do not believe that this means the world comes to an end in 2012; but a new beginning. A change, if you will. A re-prioritizing. An awakening. An enlightenment, maybe. Let's all walk together and start opening our eyes. Let's stop complaining and start following our bliss. Let's stop taking things so personally and pretending that everything is about us, when really most of the time when someone offends us it is because that person is dealing with his/ her own shit. Let's spread the love, spread the help, spread the wealth. Let's work, let's play. Let's be open to learning... Change does not come easily; when a snake sheds his skin there is convulsing. There will be ups and downs. Pitfalls and mistakes. But we can get back up again. If we do it together and push forward towards a fantastic future of heightened awareness and higher consciousness... we just may get there. Woo hoo!! ...We really do have some amazing things about this country and now is the time to count our blessings and be grateful for what we do have.

Travel

We really ought to travel as often as possible... Not to neglect responsibilities of course, but to explore the heart's desires and touch the varying surfaces of the earth. When things are stagnant where I am, I take an adventure. I don't know if this looks flighty or irresponsible.. but to me it is necessary. Right now I have jobs that let me do this. Right now is my time for exploratory growth. So while I can pick up and travel and explore new people in different niches I will. And when it is my time to return home I will. I always come back home. For me, home is where I grew up, but it is deep within myself most prominently... it can be on top of a mountain, even though I wasn't born on top of a mountain. It's where I can come back to my innermost and truest nature and feel most comfortable. Sometimes I need to travel to come back home... And when I return I bring with me treasures from my adventure. I bring smiles from people, knowledge from other facets of life, wisdom from having gone a little further outside myself.

Tolerance

Sunday, February 03, 2008

I think now more than ever it is important for us to build universal tolerance. Call me naive, but I believe that there is potential for the state of the world to move in positive direction, for people of different creeds to live in harmony and for there to be communication between warring countries, instead of fighting. I think that there could be a time and place for the end of genocide, but it all begins with tolerance of one another, and respect for our fellow man, and value of another's life, and the knowledge that one person is just as important as another. Barack Obama knows this and talks about the importance of empathy, and that is one of the reasons I back him. I actually consider myself fairly moderate when it comes to issues of politics because I believe that each issue is its own, and I try to focus on the person, more than the party. And while I have my own opinions, I respect another's and another's right to have them. Tolerance.

For any positive change in the world, it is crucial to be tolerant of what another person holds true and dear to his/ or her own heart, provided that it does not harm others. I believe that each person's life is so incredibly valuable. And while I believe in selfishness in the Ayn Rand sense and that my worth is great, I also believe that other people's lives are as great... and that in order for us to be living for ourselves in harmony eventally, we have to be selfless intitally... if we want to see any change. How can people be true to themselves if others or outside factors inhibit them from doing so? Maybe I have to sacrifice a bit of myself now in order to allow others to not have to self-sacrifice in the future. Self sacrifice may be necessary to change the state of the world. Actually, it's not self sacrifice at all, if making a positive change is something that gives one's life meaning. I guess it's more of comfort that I speak of here. If we do not sacrifice a bit of our comfort to help others, challenge totalitarian dogmas, or listen to a friend's point of view then who is going to fix things? Sometimes we need to sacrifice our comfort of not wanting to listen... and just listen.

I saw the movie Rambo the other day... The film portrays a situation of genocide and the imagery was very effective in moving me and jarring me into wanting to do something. Mr. Stallone, as Rambo, says that he's gotten so used to killing that "killing's as easy as breathing." It scares me that we live in a world where killing can be as easy as breathing. I have to congratulate Mr. Stallone on his use of diction, because "killing" is actually the antithesis of "breathing," in the sense that 'to kill' is to literally take one's breath away. The thing about politics though... the thing that makes it so heated, is that it's hard to know where to draw the line. Because I believe that interference is necessary in order to stop distopias from forming, but I do not believe in the idea of war. Is there a way to stop killing without killing? I must admit, I don't know... but, perhaps as an idealist, I want there to be. If there is, I do have a gut feeling that it all begins with tolerance of one another. I want people to be tolerant of one another, and I don't know how to properly go about this change but perhaps it starts with children. Or, it really starts with us.

Generation Y- our generation- is statistically the most jaded generation in history. We have the highest records of drug abuse, underage drinking, suicide, depression, promiscuity and sense of hopelessness than any other in recorded history. It also happens that our generation is the first to have the internet, and therefore access to the world, at our fingertips. And I think that what we see scares us. Thus, if you look at our patterns we elect to numb ourselves from the reality of what is happening around us by simply tuning out and numbing ourselves with drugs, alcohol and bad reality television. For if we don't do all of these things, then we have to confront the truths of reality for which we are responsible. Reality is almost to large for us to deal with right now, because if we look it in the eye we know that we have to do something, and doing something is bold and it is risky and it is scary. So let's start small...

Ghandi says, "be the change you wish to see in the world." Build tolerance around you. If you don't believe in ghosts, listen to your friend who does. If you believe in abortion, but your enemy does not, do not try to force them to understand where you're coming from because they won't- but do ask them nicely to listen, and agree to disagree. That's kind of what I'm saying here-- let's agree to disagree. If we agree to disagree then we can at least disagree in peace. Because no one is ever going to agree on everything. It's the nature of being human, and it's one of the wonderful things about us. Most people whom we love are actually quite different from ourselves, and yet we respect and value them anyway-- likely because of those uniquenesses and differences.

I know that two of the biggest conflicts of war in the world (and just plain conflict in general), are fights for natural resources and international religious incongruity. As animals who have built-in instincts for survival we may never stop fighting for natural resources (though i do believe our universe is vast, abundant and giving and if we stopped competing for resources we might find that there is actually enough to go around). Who knows. But fighting over religion is stupid, and horrifying. I have a hard time believing that any God would create something from a place of hate, and therefore no God would validate killing in the name of religion. Creation itself is an act of love. And psychologists say the opposite of love is fear. The only reason people fight over religion is fear. Fear of death. Fear of the unknown of what happens when we die. Because everyone believes something different. Well, killing people isn't going to make it easier. It's going to make bad energy dissipate. My god, whatever it is, is Good Energy. Iris Murdoch writes that God and Good are in fact interchangeable... that an act of prayer to one's god can be likened to sending a positive energy outside of one's self to an object of attention....

I don't know how to change the world... I don't want to change people. I just want people to be able to live their lives for themselves, in the ways they want to. Because we don't know what happens to us, but we know that we are here now. So let your neighbor do his thing, let me do mine... I'll let you do yours and I'll try not to make you try a bite of my sweet potatoes if you don't like sweet potatoes. That's what I mean, though-- you have to start that small. If someone doesn't want to see a movie, don't make them. If you like Oprah and they don't, it's okay. I like Oprah. It's enough if you like something. We have to be okay with liking different things. (Think about it- if we all liked the same person, then everyone's heart would be broken! We should be grateful for differences, and not judge and be tolerant!)

P.S.... You can completely disagree with this blog and I will listen to what you have to say. And I am open, and maybe I may like what you have to say and change my mind about something, as we continue to learn and grow from one another. And maybe I'll agree to disagree...

Gratitude and Turkeys

Turkey Time, 2007

...Tis important to be selfish in going after what one wants and living for one's self, but it is equally as important to be thankful for what one has and to always give back... When you give to the universe the universe gives to you...

here are some quotes that speak the importance of gratitude as i see it...


"At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person.
Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us."-- Albert Schweitzer

"Saying thank you is more than good manners. It is good spirituality."-- Alfred Painter

"Let us rise up and be thankful, for if we didn't learn a lot today, at least we learned a little, and if we didn't learn a little, at least we didn't get sick, and if we got sick, at least we didn't die; so, let us all be thankful."-- Buddha

"Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all the others."-- Cicero

"The Pilgrims made seven times more graves than huts. No Americans have been more impoverished than these who, nevertheless, set aside a day of thanksgiving."-- H. U. Westermayer

"As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them."-- John F. Kennedy

"The only people with whom you should try to get even are those who have helped you."-- John E. Southard

"Don't pray when it rains if you don't pray when the sun shines."-- Leroy Paige

"Appreciation can make a day, even change a life. Your willingness to put it into words is all that is necessary."-- Margaret Cousins

"If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, "thank you," that would suffice."-- Meister Eckhart

"Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order, confusion into clarity.... It turns problems into gifts, failures into success, the unexpected into perfect timing, and mistakes into important events. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow."-- Melodie Beattie

"I awoke this morning with devout thanksgiving for my friends, the old and the new."-- Ralph Waldo Emerson

"The deepest craving of human nature is the need to be appreciated."-- William James

happy thanksgiving!... i give this to you, my beloved friends and family, whom i am forever grateful for. lots of love, hugs and kisses!

The Role of the Artist

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

A true artist must continue to create everyday. If an artist is not creating, he is not doing his job and he is not following his purpose. The true creator has a desire to construct, to make something from nothing, to birth something with his hands, body, mind, voice or instrument. The need to create is derived from an instinct. There is something within that must get out... usually in order to communicate the universal subconscious messages of humankind. To create is to give; to destroy is to take. The artist ought to be giving every day-- not taking.

A friend once said to me, "Creativity, as you probably know, is never correct or incorrect. Creativity is the start of something new, whether accepted or not." An artist must take risks. There is a certain level of vulnerability that is always at stake when one creates, as one is giving part of one's self to another. It is key that the artist always be aware of his own desire and need to communicate, regardless of the response to it. Art is never right or wrong... Life is rarely black and white, but gray. The gray areas are where the risks are... where the apprehension is... It can be unsettling and uncomfortable. But when an artist relishes in the gray area for a bit, he finds that breakthroughs happen. But art istelf ought not to be gray... in life the uncertainty of gray is necessary and in the artist's journey it is necessary, but in art itself, gray is too safe... It is crucial in art to be violent-- in the sense that you have a strong gut feeling and you act on it with strong artisitic choices. Art ought to cause a violent emotional reaction. Art should make someone laugh or cry or scream or puke. An artist should never be concerned with a repulsive reaction to his art-- for a repulsive reaction is a very strong reaction. And whether or not the artist realizes it, a strong reaction-- whether negative or positive-- means that the viewer was deeply effected by the art. Great art leaves the viewer in a different state than he or she was in before taking in the art.... and because art is communication, something was therefore successfully communicated regarding the human condition... Even if communicated in a love or distaste for the most minute detail.

The artist has this need to communicate. And whatever the medium of communication, the artist must continue to communicate through his way. Art is comprised of form and content. Sometimes the form may move someone, but the content may not leave an impression. Or vice versa. There is no right or wrong... there is simply differing experiences. In "The Fountainhead," Howard Roark exemplifies the type of artist of which I speak. He has an innate need to make buildings with his hands, to bring them up out of the earth and to do it with integrity. He would rather work his own way, in a coal mine-- where he is working with raw materials, and sweating real sweat and bleeding from his hands, than take a short cut and create a building to gain societal approval. The true artist, like Howard Roark, creates to create and knows that as long as he is doing this, he is fulfilling his role. Even if he works on a building that he does not like, but gets the opportunity to build it from his heart, from raw materials, his own way... he is filling his role. An actor merely needs a space-- and any simple source of light. A writer need only a pen and a scrap of paper, a musician-- need only the instrument... Here, no fancy scenery, no elaborate computer, no chords that plug into amps... are necessary. An artist need only the raw materials and to keep creating, to keep the wheels turning, to have fun, to thrive on it, to keep going despite obstacles or any Peter Keatings they might run into along the way... If the artist pays attention to what he needs to be doing, he creates and communicates with integrity and he fills his role. If the artist is true to himself, the rest will follow.

don't take yourself so darn seriously!

Sunday, August 19, 2007


What is life if you can't have a sense of humor about it? A teacher once told our acting class, "play like children, but not childishly." The same philosophy can be applied to all of life. Take your goals and passions seriously and attack them seriously; but don't take yourself so seriously. If you fall, don't get upset... as they say in Batman, "why do we fall?... So we can learn to pick ourselves back up again." So just get back up. And laugh at yourself, because you just fell into a cactus and now you look funny. Sometimes I'll look back at a mistake I made and shake my head as if to say, 'what have I done' but then I laugh, because I've taught myself a lesson and I learn best from positive reinforcement. I think most people do, if the reinforcing is done correctly.... And obviously I don't think people ought to go out and commit crimes and laugh (I think that is bad!). In fact, I believe that people always ought to try to respect themselves, others and the world around us....We often have costume parties at my house, and it's amazing how someone can seem to have more fun when they're dressed silly. I apply the same to fashion... I don't like to dress like everybody else because that to me is boring and would be taking myself too seriously. Instead, put a little bit of creative energy into what you wear. If you feel particularly feminine one night, wear a piece of jewelry that makes you feel like a princess. If you feel especially masculine where a pair of trousers with a vest and a bowler hat. (If you are a male reading this, these suggestions aren't for you, but you get the idea... ) But be brave with having fun with yourself. Have goals that you take serious steps to accomplishing but have a sense of humor about what you are doing, where you may be going, how you are accomplishing it and why... To each his own. Just be sure you're laughing at yourself or at life while you're doing it.

If you take time for yourself, the rest will follow...

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

This is not a new discovery for me, but one that keeps coming up and reiterating itself to me. In our fast paced world it is easy to becomed bogged down in all of the data that is constantly thrown at us in this age of information. You are on myspace right now... we constantly check the internet, have access to information from other countries, cultures... we watch television programs about other people's lives-- both reality-based and fiction... we listen to radio broadcasts... overhear converstations as we pump our gas, eat at a restaurant shop at a grocery store... we are constantly accumulating the essences of other people as we interact with them on a daily basis. Most of this happens on a subconscious level. Then there are the close encounters... the informational exchanges between loved ones, friends, family and teachers... we share our opinions, voice our beliefs and exchange ideas. We make each other happy and think about it. We hurt each other and then feel bad about it and we try to look at it from the other person's point of view. Thus, we are taken outside of ourselves, in order to have compassion and respect for others and in order to be openminded so we might not to make the same mistakes again. This happens at a conscious level. But there are times when we need to be selfish... the good kind of selfish... the kind that hurts no one (or shouldn't, provided people are secure enough within themselves to realize that alone time does not mean 'i-hate-you time')...the time that one withdraws from the company of others and spends come oh-so-crucial time with the all-mighty self. I think this concept is scary to a lot of people in modernity... because we're always surrounded by something. I pose a challenge. I dare you to wake up early in the morning and do things with yourself while everybody else is sleeping. Look through a magazine for images or photos that inspire you. Create a vision/ inspiration board. Play a musical instrument. Start reading that book that's been sitting on your bookshelf since the 90s. Jot down the thoughts that plague you. Write a letter to your high school sweetheart and then burn it (but don't set the house on fire). I don't know, just do things, anything. But alone. And afterwards, you will be happy... or at the very least, you will be content. The person you love will not go away because you take a morning or an afternoon or an evening off from them. Actually, they will respect you more. And appreciate you more. And you will appreciate them more. And love them more, because you are showing yourself more love. And if you do not have anyone you love or if you have unrequited love or are heartbroken I promise you that alone time will bring you back to yourself-- the person who will always be with you, regardless of who comes in and out of your life-- and perhaps you will realize that the person whom you are crying or pining over is in fact completely wrong for you. In times of pain though family and friend time are equally as important as alone time. But back to my point... when you spend time with yourself you realize that the only thing you can ever truely know is yourself. You can never see inside of another person the way that you can of yourself. You can never feel another person's heart beating the way you can, with yourself. You can never a person's spirit or soul the way you know yours lives every day. If you are good to yourself and respect yourself... and take time for yourself... you soon realize that the things that haunt you are trivial. The fights with loved ones seem petty. Getting angry over spilled milk seems stupid. War seems stupid too, but sometimes we can't help that. But maybe if we focus on ourselves and respect ourselves more, people will start to do the same... we may accidentally lead by example and people will accidentally start respecting themselves more and then so respecting others more and then accidentally the world will be a better place. Good morning! :)